letter 2 cheri

hey just wanted to let you know i think im done but who knows i may change my mind go ahead post this and anything else you would like nicole told me you posted crap on your blog so this shit can go up there to i've posted shit on my blog but its not blocked so anyone can see it send all your friends over they can even leave me nasty comments directly whatever i did love you and someplace deep inside probably still do but i woke up to the fact that your a heartless bitch that didnt have any care for me or my feelings so i have been lashing out at you i hope you have an enjoyable life and maybe wake up someday to the fact that your a user and abuser you ended what we had i had nothing to do with it but yet you couldnt be bothered to tell me who is the immature one who is the liar who is the back stabber not me ill go on living my loser life but ill be happy maybe not today or tomarow but i will get out of this funk you put me in someday and ill know i was better off with out you in my life

i wrote this to her becuse the last couple of days i was on a bender with text and im's and the such calling her lots of names such as whore,cunt,bitch,slut...... also calling her out on shit and stuff (things i wont go into cause im not that kinda person) she then posted many of the things i said to her on her myspace blog which you can only see if your her friend i cant but got told this by somebody that she had done this i've tried looking up my aim logs but i guess they dont do that anymore oh well i bet you get my point check a couple posts down or something for my lolcheri's those pretty much sum the things i said up with maybe a couple of calling her a cat lady though in for good messure but hey whatever why should she care what i say aboot her or to her she has no care for me but i guess thats what she wants if she had told me this before she decided to start fucking somebody else or somebodies im still not sure she could have saved herself a very big headache ok i porbably would have blown up then to but she played me and that made it worse she always said we never had a relationship but what the fuck was it then going on trip together hanging out all the time saying i miss you to each other what the fuck so she decided to tell me oh i have been seeing somebody a week before my birthday (nice timing) for like 2 months but she still wants to be my friend that was total bullshit she was worried aboot her motorcycle that was in my garage and the 800 i owe her for the cruise we went on in november atlest a month after she started things with this other guy(there is picture proof on her myspace but she is hiding it by blocking everything but to friends) she used this 2 month time to drop "hints" which i see as her not wanting to fess up to cheating on me that what i see it as even if we werent boyfriend/girlfriend we were fuck buddies but she couldnt be bothered to tell me this cause i only guess she wanted to hurt me or something(more that just shows she dosent care aboot me) but to say oh i still wanna be your friend it will be just like before but we wont fuck ok then lets have it as it was before but that wasnt going to happen more lies like "oh i dont want you to come hang with me cause i like to keep my men and my friends seprate" which is bullshit she didnt want me to come hang out cause new guy was or " please dont buy me that" when i offered to buy he jewlry on the cruise and the wine tour not hey guess what please dont buy me that i dont really have feelings for you it was good but i think we should go our different ways now no she just droped hints "we need time apart" not i dont wanna see you anymore yeah im dumb hints and clues dont really work on me im dense and i know it but she says "oh i didnt mean to hurt you it was an accedent this guy asked me out the week you came to the mill and i have been fucking him for sometime now but i just couldnt tell you" what the fuck planet is she from yeah like i was going to be jumping for joy the woman i had very strong feelings for just used me for 3 or so months woohooo wake the fuck up she calls me a user and self centered that all i care aboot is me wow there killer thats the pot calling the glass black i was totally honest aboot how i felt aboot her but she lied and keep me in the dark who is the real user here after her telling me that she had been seeing somebody else i need somebody to talk to so i turned back to nicole for some support cause yeah i was hurt really bad and i had lost the person who i had thought was my best friend i tried getting into cheris head i tried getting her back in my life i missed her i loved her but she wasnt having it yeah i went a little phsyco sorry i felt hurt betraded and fucked over but to her i was over reacting i was way out of line i needed to get over it easy for her to say she had already moved on she already had somebody to take my place but i was left alone i was forced to cry to friends to make them listen to my pity parties yeah im a loser i have always know this i never claimed not to be but im a good guy i dont hurt folks for no reason i dont try and trick people im upfront with what i want and dont ask for much i dont ware masks around folks i give them me for me but yet she calls me the user i know i didnt take all this like a big boy i was a freaking little whiny baby oh well thats how i dealt with the loss of her from my life yeah i got issuses oh well atlest i feel good aboot myself at the end of the day(most of the time) i have a heart that feels love for folks i dont know if i can say the same aboot cheri but i guess thats the way the cookie crumbles and i need to move on as hard as it is going to be for me i will someday but ill always have a place in my heart for her i do for all the folks i have loved though the years some bigger then others